How to Make Your Wife's First Mother's Day Special

Mother’s Day is a special day in which we remember the important women in our lives who have earned the distinct honor of motherhood. The most cherished celebration of Mother’s Day is the first one for a new mom. Here’s how you can make it memorable.

Celebrate every Mother's Day by doing special things for your mother and your grandmother. When your wife becomes a mother too, it is crucial that you don't overlook the importance of recognizing her on this special day. She will remember her first Mother's Day for the rest of her life. The goal for a caring husband is to make the day special so that she will remember it fondly. Start planning Mother's Day for your wife months in advance to allow you enough time and savings to make it extra special.

Begin Mother's Day by allowing your wife to sleep-in. Attend to the baby's every need without asking your wife for help and keep the house quiet so that she can rest. Fix a nice breakfast including her favorite foods, like omelets, pancakes, or crepes. Serve her breakfast in bed and give her some pretty flowers, but don't go overboard. Arrange a few bright and colorful fresh-cut flowers in a pretty vase. When she is finished with breakfast, give her a long foot massage followed by a soothing body massage. If the baby is still sleeping, you could also use this time for a little intimacy and maybe share a warm shower together.

Plan an event-filled day and include activities like a trip to the park and a picnic. Be sure to take your baby along so that you all get to spend time together. As the strong and loving husband that you are, you should take over the responsibility of feeding the baby, changing all diapers, and carrying as many baby supplies as you can on your own. While you want your wife to enjoy the company of your child, you also want this day to be very stress-free for her. Take lots of pictures to include in your photo albums.

Enlist the services of a babysitter, preferably a trusted family member, and take your wife out for an elegant dinner and some entertainment. Try to plan something that you don't normally do. Take her to a nice restaurant that you've never tried. After dinner, go see a play or take a romantic night cruise. Explore whatever couples-friendly activities are available in your area. End the evening with a romantic stroll through a safe and well-lit area. When you find an especially beautiful spot, pull the piece of paper with the special poem from your pocket and read it to your wife. Share a sweet and passionate kiss with her. If all of these things are done with love and sincerity, she will remember them in perfect detail for the rest of her days. If your babysitter is willing to keep your baby all night, surprise your wife even further by reserving a nice hotel room with a Jacuzzi tub. Find the coziest bar that you can in your area and take her there to enjoy a few of her favorite drinks before retiring to the hotel for the night.

At the end of the evening, when you're both snug and comfortable in the room and your wife is expressing how wonderful a time she's had; provide her with one last sweet surprise. Give your wife her actual Mother's Day present. An ideal gift for a first Mother's Day is one that represents her, you, and your baby in a keepsake that she can hold onto forever. A picture of the three of you in a nice frame is one idea. If you are resourceful enough to have made something with your baby's hand or foot prints on it, this is a good occasion to give it to her. When it comes to the gift, it's not the dollar amount that's important, it's the thought. The dollars all go towards the events leading up to this moment.


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How to Talk to Your Husband about Problems without Fighting

It seems so cliché to say that men and women do not think alike, but many couples would benefit from acknowledging these differences. Knowing what to say and how to say it can mean the difference in an amicable resolution and a terrible fight.

Actively listen to your spouse. It is important for a husband to comprehend, not only his wife's most pressing concerns, but to dig deeper and find out how these problems affect her emotionally. Men tend to approach solving problems in the same way that they tackle challenges at work; identify the problem, brainstorm solutions, and fix it. This works very well for handling many of life's challenges, but certainly not all of them. A woman expects her man to automatically adapt to each problem, consider how it affects her on a personal level, and handle it carefully and appropriately. A man would rather solve a problem quickly, get it behind him, and move on to happier things. This is where things get a little tricky.

Be flexible. In order to communicate effectively, both men and women have to compromise to some extent. Husbands need to spend more time learning what makes their wife tick and be able to identify which things are most important to her so that he can carefully match them with any corresponding problems as they arise. Women need to be patient and realize that not every problem will receive a perfect and timely solution. Sometimes, it's acceptable to leave a few things broken in order to address larger problems.

Be respectful of each other. Both a husband and a wife need to use appropriate dialog when speaking to each other. For example, "Would you mind cleaning up the living room?" is perfectly acceptable. "You never pick up anything in here! Look at this mess! I always have to do everything and all you do is walk in and throw your junk on the floor and leave it for me to clean up!" is a little harsh. While both phrases will probably get the job done, the latter will lead to aggravation and probably an exchange of vicious words. Don't speak in generalities. Just because your husband overlooks something, don't berate him and tell him that he doesn't care. Avoid using the words "always" and "never." Do they really apply? Speak in a thoughtful manner and if you are addressing a specific concern with your husband, make the conversation about that and don't jump around and try to include everything that he's ever done to irritate you. This will confuse and aggravate him every time because he won't know for certain which problem is bothering you the most. Rather than try to fix everything at one time, it is easier for him to retreat.

Don't let the sun go down on your problems. Make the start of each day a good one. If something is bothering you in the evening, don't go to bed angry. At least try to resolve it before you sleep and if you can't, then declare a truce and resume the argument later. Don't leave the house in a fit of rage. Many people get into fights and one person jumps in the car and screeches off. It is not safe to drive when you are in a heightened emotional state. If you need a break from each other, go to separate ends of the house or go outside and get some fresh air, but don't drive away. Don't use cheap insults when speaking to each other and try not to say things you don't mean just to hurt each other's feelings. When the smoke clears and you settle down, things like that tend to leave uncertainty and weird vibes between people.

Speak to each other the way that you would like to be spoken to. Don't be condescending or mean. If you find that it is impossible to have civilized conversations with your spouse, you should seriously question whether your relationship is meant to last. If you are at this point, seek professional help from a licensed family counselor.


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How to Give Your Spouse a Relaxing Massage at Home

Treat your spouse to a well-prepared massage. Help them relax and ease the tension from a long hard day.  Begin by learning proper massage technique. You can take massage classes from a massage therapy school or you can find training DVD videos online. It is important not to hurt your spouse by using improper techniques. Also, do not attempt a hot stone therapy unless you know what you are doing.

Purchase the necessary equipment. At very least have a massage table, some linens, and some massage oil. Find a quiet room in your home where you can avoid the outside world for at least an hour. Take the phone off the hook and if you have children, let them stay with a relative for a few hours. The goal is to achieve uninterrupted quiet time with your spouse. Prepare the room by setting up the table and covering the windows with blankets to block any outside light. Turn on some relaxing music. Soft piano music is perfect for this or even some soft nature sounds. Be sure to turn the music down very low. Put a glass of ice water in the freezer so that it has time to become very cold. A heated massage table pad is a nice touch because it feels much better to lay naked on a table when it is warm. Light some scented candles or burn some scented oil to appeal to their sense of smell. Do not wear any jewelry or strong cologne or perfume.

Before you begin, find out if your spouse has any trouble areas, like shoulders, neck, or back that are bothering them. Then, while giving the massage, do not speak if you can help it. Your spouse will tell you whether the pressure you’re applying is too weak or too strong. Be mindful of your posture while giving the massage. You can very easily hurt your back if you are not careful. Breathe deeply through your nose and exhale through your mouth while you massage them. The sound of your breathing will help to relax them. Take your time and massage their entire body. When you are finished, let them lay still and relax for awhile.

When the massage is finished, offer your spouse the cold water and be sure to extinguish the candles. They may experience dizziness or even nausea after the massage. If this is the case, care for them and keep the house quiet for as long as possible. Take turns giving and receiving massages and make it a monthly or even weekly routine.

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How to Improve Your Marriage and Make it Last Forever

Even the happiest couples can slip into despair as mounting problems and distractions wear away at an otherwise successful marriage. Don’t let your love diminish and your marriage fall by the wayside. There are plenty of things you can do to fix it.

Evaluate your relationship. A lot of married couples don't see trouble coming and find themselves in a difficult situation when their marriage no longer resembles what it did at the start. Stressful jobs, problems between family and friends, verbal and physical abuse, troubled finances, infidelity, pornography addiction, drug and alcohol addiction, and even lifestyle changes can all drain the spice out of a good marriage.

Identify the problem or problems. If you can't admit to the problem, you may be contributing to it rather than helping. Secondly, talk to your partner. Just as it's unfair for your spouse to hide things from you, it's not fair for you to hide your feelings from them and expect them to change anything. If you still love them, give them a chance to make things right.

Acquire professional help. If communicating directly with your spouse does no good, you may want to involve a counselor, but it's best not to make this a family member or friend who is untrained in dealing with marriage problems. This can make the situation much worse. Sometimes, it is not practical to spend money for counseling, but you have to ask yourself how important a part of your life your spouse is. If you want to make your marriage to last, you may have to make sacrifices in order to work things out. A happy marriage is worth much more than any material thing you could ever possess anyway.

Once you've begun working on your problems, try to find some interests that you both share. Try new activities and see if you can agree on something fun to do together. If your interests don't overlap in many areas, this is OK too. Try to compromise and do things with them even if you don't enjoy them. On the flip side, they must participate in an equal number of things that you like to do.

Always listen to your partner. Whether you agree with their ideas or not, actively listen to them and give them your honest opinion, but never say anything that you will regret later. Give your marriage time to heal and continue to do things for each other. Do some research and find helpful books or movies to enjoy together.


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